Yea, I did it… slow but I did it…

Rock and Roll 1/2 Marathon in Philadelphia this weekend, it was great. I never would have thought I could have ever done it…

BTW, there are only 25 days till the 39.3 mile Avon walk for Breast Cancer, I can’t do it without you…. Please make a donation for all the Boobies you love..

www.avonwalk.org/goto/shrinkingstella

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I was asked tonight at the support group meeting, how do I make a donation to your walk…

goto

www.avonwalk.org/goto/shrinkingstella

to make a donation, please remember that you are not making the donation for me… you are making it for all the people you love who have breasts : )

I am doing my part by walking 39+ miles over two days… so please help me raise the money I am required to so I can do my part.

Thank you !
Stella

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Here it is…
face30 will give you a 30% discount.. YEA !! Come on protein Cereal and cookies !!

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Well I am still working on being comfortable in my own skin and today I saw a blip on tv that summed it all up… on What Not to Wear they told a woman that what she was wearing told people that she did not want to be noticed and that the impression she gave was that she did not matter.

I can totally relate, I am just starting to learn that I do matter and that it is ok to dress to get attention. I don’t mean dress like a person with non clothes on but dress to be attractive and be noticed… Now I wanna go shopping..

I think it is hard to get to a place where you feel good in your skin and feel ok with how you look and feel like you should show it off.. regardless of size everyone should feel this way !

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Hello…..

It’s that time of year again, I have to beg for money… I am participating in the 39+ Avon walk for Breast Cancer in NYC and I must raise a minimum of $1,800 to participate… please help me goto www.avonwalk.org/goto/shrinkingstella and make a donation… anything helps

Thank you!

Stella

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This summer has been the GREATEST !!

I think the month of June was a blurrr… we had the end of First Grade for my daughter a ton of stuff for the BOE and plans that had to be firmed up for JULY…

July was a whirl wind of activity, I didn’t have a free weekend the entire month! It was GREAT! For the 4th of July we went camping for a week in PA then I went away for a GIRLS ONLY weekend to the shore and danced my ASS off ( I wish I had danced off the last 10 lbs but oohh well) then we spent the next two weekends in LA at Disneyland visiting my family. That was by far the best, I really really missed my family. It was sad to go but it was great to see them, the trip was a surprise for my daughter. She didn’t know we were going on vacation, didn’t know we were going to California, didn’t know we were going to see Grandma, Grandpa or Uncle Joe nor did she know she was spending the week at the land of Mouse.. She had so much fun, we went on so many rides and it was awesome to fit on the kid rides and not feel like I was squished…. so great! I loved flying too, I didn’t have to worry about fitting in the seat nor did I have to turn sideways to walk down the isle.. I LOVE IT!

This weekend we went to the fair, I rode more rides and I also had another milestone… I tried on my first GOWN off the rack ! AND IT ZIPPED!

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I planted tomatoes this year, I finally had a batch that was ripe that I was home to use so I had to think of some new way to use them. I have been in a mood for shrimp so this what I made.. I took some coaxing but I even got my daughter to eat it.

Shrimp and Spinach salad

• 3 cups of washed baby spinach
• 1 can garbanzo beans, drained and rinsed
• 1 cup of grape tomatoes, cut in half
• ¼ cup of green olives diced
• ¼ cup of red onion, minced
• 1  jar of marinated mushrooms, cut in half
• 2 cups of cooked shrimp, cut into bite size pieces
• 1 ¼ cup of low carb pasta (dry measure before cooking)

Dressing

• ½ cup balsamic vinegar
• 3 tablespoons olive oil
• Salt & fresh ground black pepper to taste
• ¼ teaspoon fresh garlic

Combine all the vegetables in a large bowl, while the pasta is cooking. I cooked my shrimp in with the pasta by adding it to the end of cooking of the pasta. Drain pasta and shrimp add over vegetables ~ this will wilt the spinach slightly (I desired this if you do not let the pasta and shrimp cool) Make the dressing in small bowl by adding the olive oil to the vinegar and garlic while whisking. Pour dressing over the salad, stir to combine.

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Well, I have not been around here lately. I kinda feel like I have to re-focus but in a new way… I gained (yes I said it) three or four pounds and it sucks! I still had about 6 I wanted to shed before I was done and so now I have 10 to go. My plastic surgeon pointed something out to me last time I was at his office, he said every human/woman wants to loose 10 lbs so think of yourself as normal, I know he is right in the logical smart side of my brain plus what could I ever think that I could go from being 330 lbs to being a sex symbol?? fat chance on that one!

I fight with my husband about loosing more weight and we have disagreements about men looking at me, I am really ok with men looking at me.. actually I like it (this is the un-popular part)… I was NEVER NEVER the girl that men looked at when I walked into a room, I was only looked at when they stared in disgust and now I am someone that men look at when I walk into a room, it feels good and damn it! I like it. I feel like I have earned it and worked hard for it plus I need it so I can learn how to feel like a real person and learn how to be the new me.. People who have never been super fat have no idea how it is to go thru life invisible. You walk thru life like you don’t really exist to normal people unless you work harder or are nicer or take on more work.. I really feel that way and I can see the way that people treat me now and I know how they treated me before.

I am working hard at feeling good in my new body, it is hard cause I still don’t see myself as an attractive person nor do I see myself as a thin person and I have to learn to do it to be whole again (or for once). I am going to admit that I like it when I go out with the girls and men hit on me, it feels good be be desired. I am going to also say I have the best husband ever, he has always desired me but that is part of the problem cause he married me when I was fat, loved me when I was fat, wanted me when I was fat so in my messed up mind he would tell me I am beautiful no matter what I looked like so in a way his opinion of how I look is skewed cause he loves me unconditionally.. I know that is a great, wonderful and awesome thing but it does not help my mind and that is what needs working on still. I know it is a work in progress and is “normal” so I am ok with it. I feel like I have somewhat of a “dysmorphic” view of my body I don’t really see myself as a size 4 or a size 2 (only if they run big since I gained a few lbs) I still see myself as fat and the damn skin on my arms does not help the matters. I have such a hard time finding shirts cause of it and I can almost never find a dress cause I don’t want my arm cheese to show. I want to be normal, is this normal???

I was told that I talk about being skinny too much and talk about what I can and can’t eat too much, I have to learn how to be me and it sucks!

I just hope my husband (who is the best every) does not read this and think I don’t love and appreciate him cause I do, I would not have had the courage to take this journey if it were not for him. He has been my biggest supporter and my biggest source of support in this journey, I know it is not over it has only just started. Maybe now that I have purged this from my system I can start to move forward.

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Happy Memorial Day everyone. Go thank your veterans today, freedom is not Free!

I don’t have any new recipies today but here is a great RED, WHITE & BLUE  idea… Make a batch of angel poop and serve it layered with whipped cream, sliced strawberries (or sugar free red Jello) and Blue Berries.. YUM!!

Love to you all, be safe. We are spending the day in-doors.. : (  my daughter is having a very bad allergy day and her eyes are so so swollen, her legs are scratched till they bled so we are going to freeze in the air conditioning today while my husband gets to spend the day out on our kayak’s on the lake….

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It is official, we have entered the summer BBQ and pot luck season.. so I have  started to come up with this year’s new salads. Hope everyone has a wonderful Memorial Day weekend, don’t forget to hug a veteran or soldier.

This one is pretty good, last year I was hooked on garbanzo bean salad so this year I thought I would try lentils..

Summer Lentil Salad

• 1 lb of steamed lentils (Trader Joe’s sells them already steamed)
• 8 oz of beets ~ diced
• ½ diced onion
• 1 seedless cucumber ~ diced
• 1 cup of grape tomatoes ~ diced
• 1 cup of fresh green beans diced and blanched

Dressing:

• Juice of one lemon
• 2 tablespoons apple cider vinegar
• 1 teaspoon garlic
• Salt & Pepper
• 1/3 cup olive oil

Combine all the salad items in a large bowl. Make the dressing, in a small bowl put the lemon juice, vinegar and spices then drizzle in the olive oil while whisking. Pour dressing over salad and refrigerate for an hour to let the flavors combine. Can be served with feta cheese as a topping.

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